Let me start off by mentioning that -the saying, “hate is a strong word” is inherently stupid, because the word hate, I believe is a very descriptive and useful word. So descriptive in fact, I think it is something that aptly describes what I feel for you, Mr. Rivera. (more…)
25. Old People: Yea, no one wants to call the elderly assholes, but we all know most old people are a bunch grumpy, shitty driving assholes. Old people make great assholes, as they have problems with: staring, general confusion, holding up lines, feet shuffling, poop/B.O. smell, and the “Back in my day…” speech. Of course how could you forget that at almost every family dinner there is an old person to ruin the whole day for everyone, by either: crying, pooping there pants, or falling in the hallway.
25. When life hands you lemons, eat some Chinese food with pubic hairs. Oh wait, you just did.
24. Live everyday as though it’s your last, eat Chinese babies.
23. Your fingers can’t be of the same length, unless you are a dwarf, then your fingers look like sausages.
22. Vicious as a tigress can be, she never eats her own cubs, unless she is really hungry and has some left over hot sauce.